I promised myself that when I finally left the workplace to come back home I'd write myself a letter to remember why it was a good thing. It's so tempting to get back into the noise and mess and wonder why I left the quiet pleasantness and good friends for this chaos.
It's a sad reality, but I am much better at writing marketing plans than I am mothering and taking care of a house. (This is why I admire you so much, Carrie.) I'm not a natural mother--I love my children fiercely, but I don't "get" children in that way some nurturing types do. Maybe it was my upbringing as an only child and mostly single mother that made me think child rearing would be a lot quieter, and, well, a lot less childish. It's no secret that being home is much harder work physically, emotionally and spiritually than being at the office.
It sounds like I'm writing the reasons to not stay at home, but I think it's just the opposite.
There is no wisdom in thinking the path of least resistance is the easiest path, but there is much evidence to the contrary. There's a great saying used a lot in my Weight Watchers meeting: "Choose your hard." Being fat is hard, dieting is hard. Choose the hard you'd rather do.
As hard as it is to be with the kids, being away from the kids is hard. For me, it was impossible to work without shutting off some of the little maternal instinct I have. I wasn't parenting the way I had always meant to parent (I know, who does?)
Part of it is probably just my personal psyche--I have a hard time multitasking and shifting gears. When I'm working my brain stays at work and I have a hard time fully focusing on my home and family. After being home for a vacation or a long weekend, the reverse is true. And maybe some moms can shift gears faster and better.
But for me, I felt unable to prevent compromise on what I wanted my children to be doing and the habits I wanted them to be taught. And, despite so much argument to the contrary, my children were clearly worse off without even my lame guidance--not just because they pined for me, but because they were left with less guidance and teaching than they needed. I can see that there was some independence gained, but overall, it wasn't an ideal situation for them.
Just one day home makes it clear how many teaching opportunities come up in a single day--from the gospel to occupational tasks to civics and government back to more gospel principles. And the complexity and intensity of the forces facing our children as they come of age is mind-boggling—every lesson they can get will be sorely needed.
Yet another set of lessons lost are the ones they teach me--how to master myself, how to control my words, how to not be a huge hypocrite, how to run a household--how to pray into my life the charity I need to accomplish what I came here to earth to do in the first place.
And not just self-discipline, but the accidental lessons learned while watching and listening to my children. Their little spirits just amaze me--and there's no saying that just because I got here 30 years earlier I am so much wiser. (Yet, even with this knowledge, I'm perfectly willing to practice the grown-up double standard far too often.)
Also, in the past week at home, even though I've been working more than I ever did at the office, I've been able to hear so many great conversations that have helped my love for my children grow in a way that makes it easier to be a parent. It's difficult when we only see each other tired and cranky at the end of the day to build what has so quickly begun to regenerate after only two weeks.
I've learned that when Noah refers to any extreme of distance he will use the word "tippy"—as in, "the very tippy bottom," the "tippy back of the shelf." Ben and Sophie both need hugs and physical attention every day, several times a day, to help him feel grounded and safe, and I hadn't noticed that. Lucy has a rare but hysterical giggle.
Yesterday in the car, Sophie, Noah and Lucy were planning how they were going to play in the backyard playhouse when they got home--who wanted to be the mom, the baby, and the mayor, and that the mayor had dibs on the stroller this time. Obviously all of these roles are critical when playing house. It made me laugh--and sadly, I don't often laugh with my kids.
Working for those two years was not a mistake--I was led to that decision and led to that fantastic job and we were able to quickly solve some difficult problems, but the moment it was time to come home, I felt it.
When your time is spent primarily on any one thing, things that interfere with that primary focus are distractions, a nuisance, and a frustration. When your life is work, other personal projects (a blog!) or even an obsession with a personal problem, the children become the bother. I wrote a whole essay about this some time ago, but how can I can be expected to actually remember past life lessons more than five minutes?
At the same time, I have a very hard time just sitting down and staring at my children or doing kid things. I didn't do a lot of being a kid as a kid, so it feels very forced. However, even with my motherhood-impaired temperament, what I learned when we first moved to our little "farm" is that the slower, "old-fashioned" life can be lived alongside children rather than in spite of them, that I can enjoy what I'm doing and my children at the same time while teaching them important things.
I'm anxious to return to—and re-learn—that life, and spend less time actively teaching myself the latest marketing strategies and more time passively letting life (the Lord) teach me. Everything is so full of lessons.
So, future self, when you want to run to the quiet safety of an office, run to the garden, kids in tow, and let the chaos escape into the open air.
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work. Show all posts
Friday, April 23, 2010
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Good Day
I found out there is a brand new county gym just mile or so from my work that charges $20 a month for a membership and includes a pool! I went today and it was pretty easy to do on my lunch hour. I'm excited. I'm not joining until after Jackson, though, since we'll be out for a week. So excited!
Tonight I was on my nightly mosquito massacre (the swamp grass juice was making a mess of my walls and is only good for 36 hours before it reeks), and was thinking about how I went to bed at 1 a.m. and got up early and worked all day, doubled what I'd hoped to accomplish there, and worked out at lunch, came home and hung out with the kids and taught a voice lesson (love it!) and how I physically haven't been feeling so great and that I should be miserable.
Yet, I feel like I could keep going for another four hours (and probably will), and am not sobbing in a pint of ice-cream as generally is my wont. I've been like this all week, and more like this over the past month. It is so curious. It could just be that I have a good job and have hope and enjoy how I spend my time, but I also was reminded of the blessing I received just before I started this job, that I would be given an extra measure of strength and shouldn't underestimate myself. I can definitely witness to the truth of that--I'm a whole new person.
My co-workers were excited about being recipients of my spare zucchinis today. They are nice people. We're all writers and designers and don't need to collaborate much, so everyone just sits with headphones on all day in the dark (there are windows, but no one wants overhead lights because especially the artists need contrast of the screen). But sometimes we chat briefly, and they are all just really good people. Everyone I've met has been surprisingly normal and cool.
Every day I listen to hours of my favorite opera singers, and every day at some point I'm weeping over the gorgeousness of it. But it's ok, because my desk faces the corner. Music is true ecstasy sometimes.
It feels good to be happy, and I know I have the Lord to thank for it. Of course we're supposed to be able to be happy regardless of our circumstances, but for me, a little change in circumstances has made a huge difference.
Plus, my sweet friend Jen's husband passed his dissertation defense this week--even with jerky and unreasonable professors! The Lord truly answers prayers!! Yay Jen, on to NH!
xoxoxo
Tonight I was on my nightly mosquito massacre (the swamp grass juice was making a mess of my walls and is only good for 36 hours before it reeks), and was thinking about how I went to bed at 1 a.m. and got up early and worked all day, doubled what I'd hoped to accomplish there, and worked out at lunch, came home and hung out with the kids and taught a voice lesson (love it!) and how I physically haven't been feeling so great and that I should be miserable.
Yet, I feel like I could keep going for another four hours (and probably will), and am not sobbing in a pint of ice-cream as generally is my wont. I've been like this all week, and more like this over the past month. It is so curious. It could just be that I have a good job and have hope and enjoy how I spend my time, but I also was reminded of the blessing I received just before I started this job, that I would be given an extra measure of strength and shouldn't underestimate myself. I can definitely witness to the truth of that--I'm a whole new person.
My co-workers were excited about being recipients of my spare zucchinis today. They are nice people. We're all writers and designers and don't need to collaborate much, so everyone just sits with headphones on all day in the dark (there are windows, but no one wants overhead lights because especially the artists need contrast of the screen). But sometimes we chat briefly, and they are all just really good people. Everyone I've met has been surprisingly normal and cool.
Every day I listen to hours of my favorite opera singers, and every day at some point I'm weeping over the gorgeousness of it. But it's ok, because my desk faces the corner. Music is true ecstasy sometimes.
It feels good to be happy, and I know I have the Lord to thank for it. Of course we're supposed to be able to be happy regardless of our circumstances, but for me, a little change in circumstances has made a huge difference.
Plus, my sweet friend Jen's husband passed his dissertation defense this week--even with jerky and unreasonable professors! The Lord truly answers prayers!! Yay Jen, on to NH!
xoxoxo
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
A better day
I had Dave post that thing about the kid earlier because my work blocks a lot of sites and I couldn't get on blogger. I got a call at 8 a.m. from Paw-in-law and realized I may have managed to stress out people just like I was stressed out. Sorry if I did that to you.
I am learning something about myself. When I have tons to do, I get all fired up and am a whirlwind of productive creativity. When I have a lot of downtime or unstructured time, all of a sudden I am a bump on a log. I had all the time in the world to do the personal projects I'm taking on before I went back to work, but was stagnant. Perhaps it was discouragement about things, financial frustration--those things can be paralyzing.
But, if I was all rich and hopped up on Prozac I think I'd still be more motivated by being busy. Isn't that a funny word--business=busy-ness. It makes business seem so inane--the cause of being busy.
At work the new employees had a big 4-hour meeting on the Franklin Covey Four Disciplines of Execution today. I'll be honest, I'm a little burned out on the Covey cult and don't drink the Kool-Aid, if you know what I mean. Mainly because I think he's getting paid too much for stating the obvious, both of which he is, but most of us need the obvious stated and many are willing to pay him for it. So, kudos to him and whatever.
I'll say it. In the end, it was totally great. The whole point was to get tools to bridge the gap between what you want to accomplish and what you actually do, and I felt like I got my mind around the actual concrete things in both my job and my personal life that I can do to get me what I want. I sipped just a bit of the Kool-Aid.
Oh, I wish the camera cable wasn't in where Lucy is sleeping, I have SO many pictures for you, including no less than 20 pounds of produce I picked today. I spent my evening making zucchini bread, grating bags of zucchini for the freezer, roasting chiles--it's a fun time.
Well, it's 11:37, I need to get up at 6 and I still have empires to build tonight, so I'd better go.
I am learning something about myself. When I have tons to do, I get all fired up and am a whirlwind of productive creativity. When I have a lot of downtime or unstructured time, all of a sudden I am a bump on a log. I had all the time in the world to do the personal projects I'm taking on before I went back to work, but was stagnant. Perhaps it was discouragement about things, financial frustration--those things can be paralyzing.
But, if I was all rich and hopped up on Prozac I think I'd still be more motivated by being busy. Isn't that a funny word--business=busy-ness. It makes business seem so inane--the cause of being busy.
At work the new employees had a big 4-hour meeting on the Franklin Covey Four Disciplines of Execution today. I'll be honest, I'm a little burned out on the Covey cult and don't drink the Kool-Aid, if you know what I mean. Mainly because I think he's getting paid too much for stating the obvious, both of which he is, but most of us need the obvious stated and many are willing to pay him for it. So, kudos to him and whatever.
I'll say it. In the end, it was totally great. The whole point was to get tools to bridge the gap between what you want to accomplish and what you actually do, and I felt like I got my mind around the actual concrete things in both my job and my personal life that I can do to get me what I want. I sipped just a bit of the Kool-Aid.
Oh, I wish the camera cable wasn't in where Lucy is sleeping, I have SO many pictures for you, including no less than 20 pounds of produce I picked today. I spent my evening making zucchini bread, grating bags of zucchini for the freezer, roasting chiles--it's a fun time.
Well, it's 11:37, I need to get up at 6 and I still have empires to build tonight, so I'd better go.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
My 101st Post
Highlights of today--found two (big) cucumbers I hadn't seen before, the first, and ate one of them with salt on the spot. Came up with a good PR idea at work which people liked. Dreamed about how I want to start this or that business. Wrote several new blogs I never intend to start in my head. Listened to two full operas at work (we can have headphones), one of which brought me to tears. Found a new voice teacher for myself. Talked to some friends on the phone. Watched a flash-flood thunderstorm come down out the window at work. Ate sweets.
Downside was when Sophie dramatically and accusingly told me that she was forgetting she even has a mommy lately (yesterday I got another version of this statement from her), and when I came home David rushed downstairs to get some work done and I was left with three children fighting over my lap and crying for attention while Ben tried to talk over it to tell me about his day. Also, I ate sweets, and I'm up 10 lbs since moving here! I wanted to buy a cow, not be one!
Yesterday my friends the Hunters came over which was super fun--I love being in a place all my long-lost friends come to visit.
Things are good. My husband has the hardest part, because we both have identical income quotas and he has to make his while watching the kids all day and then working into the night. That's modern living, I guess. He's a good man.
PS. There was actually an article outing that funny blog I mentioned below, if you want to know who is really writing it.
Downside was when Sophie dramatically and accusingly told me that she was forgetting she even has a mommy lately (yesterday I got another version of this statement from her), and when I came home David rushed downstairs to get some work done and I was left with three children fighting over my lap and crying for attention while Ben tried to talk over it to tell me about his day. Also, I ate sweets, and I'm up 10 lbs since moving here! I wanted to buy a cow, not be one!
Yesterday my friends the Hunters came over which was super fun--I love being in a place all my long-lost friends come to visit.
Things are good. My husband has the hardest part, because we both have identical income quotas and he has to make his while watching the kids all day and then working into the night. That's modern living, I guess. He's a good man.
PS. There was actually an article outing that funny blog I mentioned below, if you want to know who is really writing it.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Observations on leaving kids to go back to work
- My kids absentmindedly call me "dad" when they want something
- Absence does make the heart grow fonder. I am a pretty hot commodity now and get lots of cuddles.
- Lucy prefers David when she's upset.
- I do tend to spoil a bit more, just as they warn you against.
This week has been hard on everyone, but mainly on my 15 year old cousin, who has watched the kids every day from 1-5 and is a little burned out. My mom has done 7a-1p and actually loves it, and is cleaning my house in the process. She wonders what my problem is that I can't do both. I am really grateful to her and glad she's adjusted to the idea of hanging out with four children without panicking. She is a saint. It is so good to be mothered. I'm sure my kids feel the same way, but at least they are getting mothered by Mommy's Mom.
Today I got home a bit late and Kim, another saint, was feeding my children along with hers, and then she fed me. That was a lifesaver. We came home and reviewed the garden, weeded a bit and set the sprinklers going. And...
I picked my first zucchini!!!
It was an Italian Striped, and a total surprise, I hadn't looked underneath there in several days, so I thought we were still in blossom stage all over the garden. I also picked a globe zucchini--almost the size of a tennis ball, all round and cute, it was buried down in there, too. I picked a small onion and some basil and am going upstairs to fry it up and gobble it down right now. Oh, and I also found a green pepper which I picked, blanched and put in a freezer bag.
I have to keep things picked so they'll keep producing. The chili peppers are kind of wanting to be picked, but I need to decide what I'm going to do with them--freeze, roast and freeze, make salsa verde? Any suggestions?
I have a feeling that soon I'll have a blessing so great that I will not have room to receive it. But, I can always take baskets to work if I get overwhelmed.
Oh, I reviewed my first writing project of about 10 pages with my boss today (which is why I was late home), and he liked my stuff, so that's a weight off. We see eye to eye on style and approach, which is huge. He has promised never to read my blog again, so that's also nice. I also finished a 20 page marketing plan for the remainder of the year today, so let's see if he's up for everything I'm asking for.
David's home tomorrow, we made it!
Monday, July 14, 2008
Single Mothers, I salute you!
I'm a single working mom this week, and have lots of support from my mom and cousin, but seriously, I am wasted. If this were really my life I'd have to use this time to pick up the house, do bills, etc. Since I'm just faking for a few days, I'm just holding my breath until Friday. It has been a trick just staying awake until sundown so I can go put the chickens in without a fight.
Lord, please help my husband live a long time and not do anything to make me have to divorce him!
Lord, please help my husband live a long time and not do anything to make me have to divorce him!
Sunday, July 13, 2008
I hear that life is good
My husband's work has been really picking up, and here I have a job and stuff. We have this fabulous house and two big gardens, and two kittens and a full hen house. I have a zucchini plant up to my waist. On Saturday I weeded for 4 hours, picked all the cherries (made a pie today), planted carrots and radishes, organic bug-sprayed the grapes and potatoes, and generally farmed.
On Friday I went to a Marketing Department retreat, and we spent the morning learning about our communication styles (mine: apparentely I'm a shapeshifter, whatever works in the moment), and our strengths (mine: Learner, Ideation, Futurist, Relator and Activator--all made-up words that mean I live in my head and in the future, relate to people and love to start stuff). Then we rode horses in a gorgeous canyon for a few hours. I ended the day knowing (and liking) my team quite a bit. Plus, I'm getting in to the actual work part of my job now the training part is wrapping up, so I'm looking forward to my week and know what I'll be doing.
As much as I wanted David to get another job, I realize this job makes it so we don't have to scramble to take care of the kids and house, it pays well (when there's work) and makes him available to do some other things that may be useful to him down the road. It makes it so we can both work without having the kids taken care of by non-parents (except when David is traveling).
But I talked to my pal Lori yesterday and was all, "But what about [whine whine]," and she clearly explained how perfect everything is, and how we're being allowed to have this great lifestyle even though we haven't fixed everything yet, and how now we have this great situation to get everything put together. I left that call totally woken up to how completely ungrateful and unaware I was being--there is clearly a plan.
I'll just say it, judge me, whatever, but I don't miss being at home when I'm at work. I like doing what I'm good at, I don't like doing what I'm bad at. I sometimes lament that what I'm good at has no eternal significance, and what I'm bad at is critical for eternity, but hey, there it is. I love my kids, I love my family. I'm a crap housekeeper and the day to day of homemaking makes me mentally ill. I'm messed that way. Apparently God knows me, I'm His creation after all, and he's arranging my life accordingly for now I guess.
The thing about that "strengths" exercise was there's a place in the "Strengthsfinder" book that explained that it is inefficient to constantly focus on your weaknesses. Sure, you need to bring them up to a level they don't destroy your life or overshadow your strengths, but if you are a natural 2 at something and put a ten effort, you will still be a 20, whereas if you work on the stuff you are a 9 at and try just as hard, you will be a 90. Think Michael Jordan, who was a 10 talent and 10 effort. He tried baseball, and he was no 10 talent, so he couldn't come up with the same result.
The American dream is about overcoming odds and weaknesses, our culture is obsessed with our weaknesses. And we're all about equal opportunity and saying to our kids that they can be anything they want if they try hard enough--but life is so much easier when you try hard enough with something that is already a talent for you. We've said that the Chinese and Russian communist states were oppressive because they take kids who show talent in something at a young age and direct them into that career permanently. Maybe that's extreme, but I also think it is oppressive to spend my life fighting against weaknesses and ignoring my strengths. We all have both, which do you want to spend your life thinking about?
On Friday I went to a Marketing Department retreat, and we spent the morning learning about our communication styles (mine: apparentely I'm a shapeshifter, whatever works in the moment), and our strengths (mine: Learner, Ideation, Futurist, Relator and Activator--all made-up words that mean I live in my head and in the future, relate to people and love to start stuff). Then we rode horses in a gorgeous canyon for a few hours. I ended the day knowing (and liking) my team quite a bit. Plus, I'm getting in to the actual work part of my job now the training part is wrapping up, so I'm looking forward to my week and know what I'll be doing.
As much as I wanted David to get another job, I realize this job makes it so we don't have to scramble to take care of the kids and house, it pays well (when there's work) and makes him available to do some other things that may be useful to him down the road. It makes it so we can both work without having the kids taken care of by non-parents (except when David is traveling).
But I talked to my pal Lori yesterday and was all, "But what about [whine whine]," and she clearly explained how perfect everything is, and how we're being allowed to have this great lifestyle even though we haven't fixed everything yet, and how now we have this great situation to get everything put together. I left that call totally woken up to how completely ungrateful and unaware I was being--there is clearly a plan.
I'll just say it, judge me, whatever, but I don't miss being at home when I'm at work. I like doing what I'm good at, I don't like doing what I'm bad at. I sometimes lament that what I'm good at has no eternal significance, and what I'm bad at is critical for eternity, but hey, there it is. I love my kids, I love my family. I'm a crap housekeeper and the day to day of homemaking makes me mentally ill. I'm messed that way. Apparently God knows me, I'm His creation after all, and he's arranging my life accordingly for now I guess.
The thing about that "strengths" exercise was there's a place in the "Strengthsfinder" book that explained that it is inefficient to constantly focus on your weaknesses. Sure, you need to bring them up to a level they don't destroy your life or overshadow your strengths, but if you are a natural 2 at something and put a ten effort, you will still be a 20, whereas if you work on the stuff you are a 9 at and try just as hard, you will be a 90. Think Michael Jordan, who was a 10 talent and 10 effort. He tried baseball, and he was no 10 talent, so he couldn't come up with the same result.
The American dream is about overcoming odds and weaknesses, our culture is obsessed with our weaknesses. And we're all about equal opportunity and saying to our kids that they can be anything they want if they try hard enough--but life is so much easier when you try hard enough with something that is already a talent for you. We've said that the Chinese and Russian communist states were oppressive because they take kids who show talent in something at a young age and direct them into that career permanently. Maybe that's extreme, but I also think it is oppressive to spend my life fighting against weaknesses and ignoring my strengths. We all have both, which do you want to spend your life thinking about?
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Can you write an interesting blog with a boring life?
Quiz: Guess Who?The job is fine, I don't mean to say boring, because I actually like it. Most of it is work that I'm familiar with and comfortably in my skill set, which keeps the stress low even as the workload ramps up. But 9 hours in an office is not quite the rich and diverse life I was taking for granted up until now.
Drive, work, drive, make dinner, eat, wash dishes, wash children, read stories or FHE, family prayer/scripture/song, tuck ins (generally involving "Mommy why do you have to go to work?" conversations), maybe weed, go to bed.
That's pretty much it, folks, I've put in my blog entry for yesterday, today and probably every work week from here on out. It is a little sad when a person no longer owns her own time, but a blessing nonetheless--it's that "exchange value" Marx talked about in the little red book. It's not as fulfilling as "use value," but, as Marx didn't say, it pays the bills. (That would be the bebearded Marx-of-the-crazy-afro above.)
PS. BTW, I'm not a communist, even though some of you may think so because of my political leanings. xoxoxo
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Busy week
Four generations! That lady with hardly any wrinkles in the middle? Yep, she's 88. Let me tell you about granny's skin care regimen--sheesh! I can't, it's a state secret anyway.
Here are the tomatoes on the West garden side, they are all of a sudden growing fast, they must like this warm weather we've finally been getting this week.
Saturday was so productive, the coop is almost done, everything was weeded, I thinned the corn (but cheated and took all the extra plants out and replanted them somewhere else). There was organic pesticide sprayed on all the fruit trees, grapes and berries. I still need to thin the fruit on the fruit trees. I am stressing over my compost and going to get some professional advice on that at the garden center this week.
I had a 3.5 hour job interview on Friday for a full time job in marketing for a company in SLC. The position has been open for four months, and I sent them a resume on Monday, they called Tuesday, we did a phone interview Wednesday, I put my portfolio on the web for them Thursday, and then I did the crazy interview (one room, two interviewers, two breaks, three water bottles), and they said when they are ready to make an offer they start reference checks.
Well, they are having me schedule the reference checks for Monday and Tuesday.
It was so weird rehashing my whole life with them. It will also be weird talking to my old Sprint boss--immesshed, educational, intense and all-encompasing are the words that come to mind of my time being what he called his "work wife." A very different time, and that corporate life is such a very different world. But, it was one I was strangely happy and relaxed in on Friday.
David is getting a bit more work from the company he's been with for three years. Last month we thought they'd dried up completely, but now it looks like it will keep us going a big longer. We are still actively looking hard for a regular position for him also. Between the two of us, we will be able to execute a 7-year plan to put our lives back in a good place. I have talked to my Bishop and other trusted counselors and feel very relieved about this plan. I know that being here in Utah will make things easier for the kids.
Plus, this wonderful woman I was working with when I was deciding on doing a day care, she lives three houses down and runs the sweetest little 8-child, all-girl day care complete with French and ballet. I told her I likely need to be on her very long waiting list, and she said she will have an opening in late August and I'm officially on the top of the waiting list as far as she's concerned. That is a huge relief for my concerns about Lucy.
Well, it looks like after all the many, many doors we've pushed on and keep pushing on, one is opening. It is not the door I thought would be the right one for us, or that I thought I wanted to be the right one, but I can see that right now, it is a miracle that it seems to be a very timely solution for us.
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I look like my dad in this picture, which is very, very disturbing to me, but everyone else looked cute, so I'm swallowing my pride and putting it in.
The chickens are getting so big! Here's Lucy at sunset, following me around while I took some pics of the fatties.
All the chickens are the same age, and some of the fryers are girls, so it is not a gender thing here, all about breeding. Fryer's on the left, laying hen on the right (and bottom). Although you can see the bright red comb on top of the fryer, so it is a boy. The girl fryers' combs are pale and smaller, and there are none that I've seen yet on on the layers.
So here's the West garden all going green! And Lucy. The hose and my bag of compost make it unkempt, but hey, we're working here. Far left row from front to back, two acorn squash plants and four varieties of potato, beets in back. Middle row front to back: chard, carrots, onions, peas, tomatoes. Right row is all squash and beans with corn in the back.
This is my tallest corn. I just weeded it three days ago, and you can see it is already being overrun, so I'll be on that tomorrow. It's the Sabbath after all.
Here are the tomatoes on the West garden side, they are all of a sudden growing fast, they must like this warm weather we've finally been getting this week.Saturday was so productive, the coop is almost done, everything was weeded, I thinned the corn (but cheated and took all the extra plants out and replanted them somewhere else). There was organic pesticide sprayed on all the fruit trees, grapes and berries. I still need to thin the fruit on the fruit trees. I am stressing over my compost and going to get some professional advice on that at the garden center this week.
I had a 3.5 hour job interview on Friday for a full time job in marketing for a company in SLC. The position has been open for four months, and I sent them a resume on Monday, they called Tuesday, we did a phone interview Wednesday, I put my portfolio on the web for them Thursday, and then I did the crazy interview (one room, two interviewers, two breaks, three water bottles), and they said when they are ready to make an offer they start reference checks.
Well, they are having me schedule the reference checks for Monday and Tuesday.
It was so weird rehashing my whole life with them. It will also be weird talking to my old Sprint boss--immesshed, educational, intense and all-encompasing are the words that come to mind of my time being what he called his "work wife." A very different time, and that corporate life is such a very different world. But, it was one I was strangely happy and relaxed in on Friday.
David is getting a bit more work from the company he's been with for three years. Last month we thought they'd dried up completely, but now it looks like it will keep us going a big longer. We are still actively looking hard for a regular position for him also. Between the two of us, we will be able to execute a 7-year plan to put our lives back in a good place. I have talked to my Bishop and other trusted counselors and feel very relieved about this plan. I know that being here in Utah will make things easier for the kids.
Plus, this wonderful woman I was working with when I was deciding on doing a day care, she lives three houses down and runs the sweetest little 8-child, all-girl day care complete with French and ballet. I told her I likely need to be on her very long waiting list, and she said she will have an opening in late August and I'm officially on the top of the waiting list as far as she's concerned. That is a huge relief for my concerns about Lucy.
Well, it looks like after all the many, many doors we've pushed on and keep pushing on, one is opening. It is not the door I thought would be the right one for us, or that I thought I wanted to be the right one, but I can see that right now, it is a miracle that it seems to be a very timely solution for us.
Anyway, I'll let you know. Maybe my references will let the cat out of the bag about me and there won't be an offer after all.
But if so, then I'll be a working full time farmer with four kids. That will make for a lot of interesting blogging which I will never have time to do. However, I really like the company and know I'd be good at the job. Plus, paychecks are nice.
PS--if you click on the link about my dad above, you'll learn that he was in fact one of the inventors of the PC. Cool huh? But he's dead now. And he was nuts.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Let's hear it for my mom . . .
Let's give my mom a hand . . .
Am I really that old? You all probably have no reference for that. Sigh. Good old 80s
Anyway, short post today because my fingers are stiffening up. I dreamed all night about how I should be trying to take off the sod in the pasture, not digging holes and then shaking off the dirt. I did a 2ft x 40 ft swatch by hand this morning and had three new blisters and old-people hands. My mom insisted we rent something and offered to foot the bill.
I called Diamond rental and asked about a sod-cutter to take off the grass in the 4 ft "boxes"--then we could use my cousin's rear-tine tiller (big) to till them no problem--the grass is the problem for the tiller. The rental wasn't that much, just $20 an hour, and they only counted two hours even though we were bringing it back tomorrow morning.
Now, all the boxes are grass free (8 of them, ranging from 60 ft to 30 feet). However, though the machines may be faster, they are not easier. I felt like I was taming a 300 lb, very loud bronco all day, followed by a great deal of rolling the very heavy sod up and putting it in the aisles. We worked until there was just no more light, about 9 p.m.
I have never, ever done this much physical labor in one day. I literally can hardly walk.
Boo hoo, I know, It's my own fault. Still, I'm excited that we are so much closer to having it ready to plant than we were last night. Yay! Ow!!
PS: Hey Suz, I've done my share of lurking on sites and you're very welcome to hang out--glad you liked the vid--it's wacky and interesting and really makes you think about things. My grandma was also silent between her stroke and her death, and I really felt she was aware of things. The brain is a fascinating thing.
Am I really that old? You all probably have no reference for that. Sigh. Good old 80s
Anyway, short post today because my fingers are stiffening up. I dreamed all night about how I should be trying to take off the sod in the pasture, not digging holes and then shaking off the dirt. I did a 2ft x 40 ft swatch by hand this morning and had three new blisters and old-people hands. My mom insisted we rent something and offered to foot the bill.
I called Diamond rental and asked about a sod-cutter to take off the grass in the 4 ft "boxes"--then we could use my cousin's rear-tine tiller (big) to till them no problem--the grass is the problem for the tiller. The rental wasn't that much, just $20 an hour, and they only counted two hours even though we were bringing it back tomorrow morning.
Now, all the boxes are grass free (8 of them, ranging from 60 ft to 30 feet). However, though the machines may be faster, they are not easier. I felt like I was taming a 300 lb, very loud bronco all day, followed by a great deal of rolling the very heavy sod up and putting it in the aisles. We worked until there was just no more light, about 9 p.m.
I have never, ever done this much physical labor in one day. I literally can hardly walk.
Boo hoo, I know, It's my own fault. Still, I'm excited that we are so much closer to having it ready to plant than we were last night. Yay! Ow!!
PS: Hey Suz, I've done my share of lurking on sites and you're very welcome to hang out--glad you liked the vid--it's wacky and interesting and really makes you think about things. My grandma was also silent between her stroke and her death, and I really felt she was aware of things. The brain is a fascinating thing.
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